Self Image

How much time do you have? I never lost my hair to chemotherapy but I suffered everything else, nausea, fatigue, metal mouth..... I made a friend in the hospital. Our surgery was the same day, same plastic surgeon which is how we came to meet. Our chemo was identical and she did hers two days after I did mine. Point of even mentioning? We made sure not to speak until she was two days out, too. I remember the day we spoke after round three and she asked me about my hair. We were both sobbing on the phone. She sailed through with NO other issues but I believed that losing her hair was far worse to deal with than anything I was going through. I know how I felt for my friend.

Self image? Totally decimated. Making the (right for me) choice to have a bilateral mastectomy and knowing I would no longer have my "real" body was upsetting and scary. After the surgery, I avoided looking at my chest. The tissue expanders look awful. Unfortunately, mine were in for almost 8 months. I always changed my clothes with my back to my husband. I even did that after the "permanent" implants were in.... and after the nipple reconstruction and after the tattoos. I was confident in clothing but I was not comfortable in my own skin. I DO believe a very supportive partner, someone who is affectionate and gently guides you back would be a helpful thing. But it would still be a process.

One year ago, my marriage began to unravel. Shortly after the separation I had a total hysterectomy. Between the breasts already gone and now all the rest of the parts that physiologically make me different than a male, I have felt like I am not a woman. I realize that I am not defined by the sum total of my original body parts. I get it... being a person is about WHO you are and not WHAT you have but it is still very upsetting.

The thought of being intimate with a man scares the living daylights out of me. Between the dots on my abdomen from the hysterectomy, the scars from the mastectomy, the fact that I have absolutely NO feeling in my foobs, the fact that they in no way feel natural...... it's just damn frightening. Aside from the body appearance, being on femara has its own set of challenges with intimacy, too.

It's been a very long road for me to get my mojo back and I'm still not quite there. Having friends with whom I can talk about my fears is helpful. Having a really good friend who knows when she can cross the line into turning it into a joke because she knows my feelings have been validated in that moment is priceless. This is indeed a complicated and painful thing to describe and under my own personal circumstances, I may not even be the best one to attempt to answer this question. I'm just going to it that answer button and not look back.

I hope this isn't doing more harm than good......... Cancer negatively impacts a woman's self image in many ways. From surgery scars, to removed body parts, to weight gain, weight loss, hair loss (including eyelashes and eyebrows), skin changes, and other physiological and appearance changes, cancer often completely alters a woman's self-identity, typically for the worse, and in ways that make it so hard for her to self-identify as strong, healthy, or beautiful.

Hi Murray self-image or body image is how a person views him or herself. It is a component of self-concept, so sometimes it is referred to as physical self-concept. Each individual views him/herself differently. Sometimes minor alterations to an individual's appearance may be very traumatic for a person (even though that alteration may be almost un-noticeable to others)So self image is very individual and we cannot assume that just because an alteration in appearance is small that it may not affect a person. Within the context of cancer, there are many alterations in appearance eg weight loss, weight gain, hair loss, surgical scars, etc. Methods to address alterations in self- image include participation in programmes such as the look good feel better programme, talking to peers and health professionals about concerns. Sometimes individuals may need counselling or cognitive behavioural therapy if their self-image has been severely affected by the alterations in appearnace associated with hair loss. I hope this helps. Thank you, Sinead Hi Murray self-image or body image is how a person views him or herself. It is a component of self-concept, so sometimes it is referred to as physical self-concept. Each individual views him/herself differently. Sometimes minor alterations to an individual's appearance may be very traumatic for a person (even though that alteration may be almost un-noticeable to others)So self image is very individual and we cannot assume that just because an alteration in appearance is small that it may not affect a person. Within the context of cancer, there are many alterations in appearance eg weight loss, weight gain, hair loss, surgical scars, etc. Methods to address alterations in self- image include participation in programmes such as the look good feel better programme, talking to peers and health professionals about concerns. Sometimes individuals may need counselling or cognitive behavioural therapy if their self-image has been severely affected by the alterations in appearnace associated with hair loss. I hope this helps. Thank you, Sinead