Overcoming Challenges

You have to be passionate about what you want to do. I knew that I had a great idea in connecting survivors online. You have to remember that this was before online social networking became big. I had the idea at the beginning of 2005, before Facebook, YouTube and Blogging! But I knew that there had to be a way that breast cancer survivors could find each other online and get the support they needed. One of the challenges was the feedback I rec'd from the medical community. I spoke to my oncologist and surgeon about it and they were supportive, but you could tell that they didn't really believe in it. Dr. Susan Love was a mom at my daughter's school so I called her up. She basically said, "don't bother, because I'm going to eradicate breast cancer within 10 years." I thought,"that's fantastic, but there will STILL be survivors!" You HAVE to be passionate! You have to be passionate about what you want to do. I knew that I had a great idea in connecting survivors online. You have to remember that this was before online social networking became big. I had the idea at the beginning of 2005, before Facebook, YouTube and Blogging! But I knew that there had to be a way that breast cancer survivors could find each other online and get the support they needed. One of the challenges was the feedback I rec'd from the medical community. I spoke to my oncologist and surgeon about it and they were supportive, but you could tell that they didn't really believe in it. Dr. Susan Love was a mom at my daughter's school so I called her up. She basically said, "don't bother, because I'm going to eradicate breast cancer within 10 years." I thought,"that's fantastic, but there will STILL be survivors!" You HAVE to be passionate!

Giving up or not moving forward is not part of my DNA. After my father died when I was 12, mother and I role reversed. I became the mother, and she became the daughter out of necessity. She couldn't cope with his death. From that moment on, I knew I didn't want to be a helpless victim like my mother.

My first husband taught me to always plan for worst case, because if you've got that figured out, you've got most everything covered. That way of thinking has never left me. When I was 37, I was traveling alone in Central America and was kidnapped by the Honduran Military Commandos. The whole time I was being held, I never once panicked or lost sight of the fact that if I didn't remain calm, I might not survive. I also had to keep someone else who was with me calm. As a result, we're still here to talk about it, although I don't talk about the details much.

Marrying James Coffee was the best thing that ever happened to me. Not only did he love and value me more than anyone in my life, including my parents, he was an example of someone who lived their faith in God without preaching. Little by little, I realized he had something I wanted... I needed. God. Since then I've come to believe in God and His Son. Since James' death eight months ago, God has been my rock. I now understand "surrender" for I have surrendered my life, knowing that God knows what's best for me.

Perhaps you could call it persistence, maybe positive thinking. I think it's a combination of strengths as well as turning things over to God. Giving up or not moving forward is not part of my DNA. After my father died when I was 12, mother and I role reversed. I became the mother, and she became the daughter out of necessity. She couldn't cope with his death. From that moment on, I knew I didn't want to be a helpless victim like my mother.

My first husband taught me to always plan for worst case, because if you've got that figured out, you've got most everything covered. That way of thinking has never left me. When I was 37, I was traveling alone in Central America and was kidnapped by the Honduran Military Commandos. The whole time I was being held, I never once panicked or lost sight of the fact that if I didn't remain calm, I might not survive. I also had to keep someone else who was with me calm. As a result, we're still here to talk about it, although I don't talk about the details much.

Marrying James Coffee was the best thing that ever happened to me. Not only did he love and value me more than anyone in my life, including my parents, he was an example of someone who lived their faith in God without preaching. Little by little, I realized he had something I wanted... I needed. God. Since then I've come to believe in God and His Son. Since James' death eight months ago, God has been my rock. I now understand "surrender" for I have surrendered my life, knowing that God knows what's best for me.

Perhaps you could call it persistence, maybe positive thinking. I think it's a combination of strengths as well as turning things over to God.