Life Balance

Like all questions of work-life balance, this one is hard to answer because it is so personal.

My top priorities in life are spending time with my kids and husband, spending time with family and friends, and excelling in my job (I am a PhD-level microbiologist). I also had to learn how to excel at being a patient while still having time and energy for these other focal areas. In the heart of illness, my health trumped everything else. However, everything else could take on a new form. Instead of walking my kids to the playground, I laid on the floor and did puzzles. Instead of going out with friends, friends watched movies on the couch with me. Instead of going to work and performing an experiment, I worked on writing projects on my laptop at home. In short, I tried to keep my other priorities, but I adjusted my expectations for myself in them. And if I had a down day where I felt awful for whatever reason, I didn't force myself to tackle any of these other priorities.

My first piece of advice is to let your health take priority. You can't perform your other priorities if you are dead.

My second piece of advice is to continue to function at some level in your other priorities. This will help you maintain your sense of self-worth, keep you in close contact with your support network, and speed your recovery. Like all questions of work-life balance, this one is hard to answer because it is so personal.

My top priorities in life are spending time with my kids and husband, spending time with family and friends, and excelling in my job (I am a PhD-level microbiologist). I also had to learn how to excel at being a patient while still having time and energy for these other focal areas. In the heart of illness, my health trumped everything else. However, everything else could take on a new form. Instead of walking my kids to the playground, I laid on the floor and did puzzles. Instead of going out with friends, friends watched movies on the couch with me. Instead of going to work and performing an experiment, I worked on writing projects on my laptop at home. In short, I tried to keep my other priorities, but I adjusted my expectations for myself in them. And if I had a down day where I felt awful for whatever reason, I didn't force myself to tackle any of these other priorities.

My first piece of advice is to let your health take priority. You can't perform your other priorities if you are dead.

My second piece of advice is to continue to function at some level in your other priorities. This will help you maintain your sense of self-worth, keep you in close contact with your support network, and speed your recovery.

What a great answer. Look at us validating each other ;-) Seriously though, I think it's important to find a balance. I definitely think it's time you used your spa certificate. You deserve it. Thank you for echoing my need to have conversations outside of the cancer community that have nothing to do with cancer, but also to form friendships within the cancer community that are about so much more than just cancer.
Big hugs to you and keep up the amazing work!
Terri That's a good question! After my mastectomy I felt so driven to give back that I jumped into whatever I could to be of use. I'm also a bit of a workaholic, especially when I'm enjoying what I'm doing. Since I started building the WhereWeGoNow community, I've so enjoyed every contact (in person and virtually) that's it hard for me to remember to pull back sometimes from all cancer all the time.

So, maybe I'm the wrong I person to ask this question. I do know, however, that I relish talking to old and new friends who are not a part of the cancer community. I make it a point to see one of them once every week or two and we have amazing conversations about everything (except cancer.)

My family also keeps me focused on other things. What I should do more of is yoga and "me time" relaxation activities. I got a spa certificate from my husband for my birthday five months ago and have yet to go. I think it's about time, don't you?